Sick

Image Credit:Flickr/ jovino  

I apologize for my absence, and I apologize for the fact that this post is probably not up to par. You won't leave here feeling informed, refreshed, or more knowledgeable about much of anything because I've spent the last week or so wondering if there is enough facial tissue in the world to collect all the stuff that's been coming out of my head and chest. Yep, sick. At first I thought it was just allergies or a reaction to the landfill fire that burned for over 2 weeks near my community; but in the end I think it was an evil intrusion of germs. While laying in bed and wondering how my family was faring in the rest of the house, I totally freaked myself out by watching all of Season 3 of the show 24 on Netflix. The whole season dealt with biological terrorism: the Counter-Terrorist Unit was trying to recover a huge vial of a weaponized virus. The bad guy planned to release it in cities all over the U.S. causing imminent death to millions of people. The first symptom of the virus was a bloody nose, and anyone who thought they were infected first wiped their nose. A drippy nose feeling caused person after person to wipe their nostrils looking for blood. My drippy nose got wiped about ten million times a day. Virus on TV, virus in my house...what if....AAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!  Way to get paranoid about my runny nose, eh?

If I wasn't freaking out about potential bioterrorist occurrences in my nose, all I could think about was this British alternative comedy that I used to watch on MTV in the 1980's The Young Ones. One episode in particular kept running through my mind because I seriously went through like 800 boxes of tissues in about 2 days. Thank goodness trash day fell in the middle of my bout with the slime, or my house would be filled to the brim with dirty snot rags. It was that bad. But not as bad as the sick boys in The Young Ones. Check out their sickness in the clip if you can handle totally disgusting, very low-brow, and outrageously funny British humor (okay, it was outrageously funny when I was a punk rock girl in high school...not so sure about now! But it is exactly what went through my mind all this week. For real.)

I am happy to say that I am now able to sit upright, and I even showered a couple of times in the past 2 days! I ventured out of my house (just to buy more tissues, of course!) but I seem to be on the mend. Now I just need to make sure that my self-quarantine to the bedroom was effective. If my kids get the crud I only have one suggestion for all of you: BUY STOCK IN KLEENEX! For real. You'll make a killing.

If they don't get sick, they are in for a rude awakening. They will be cleaning up the messes they made all week by scrubbing, vacuuming and laundering everything (and I mean everything.) Why is it that common sense flies out the window and chores come to a grinding halt when Mom is down for the count? Have they not heard that hell hath no fury like a mom whose house has been messed up? No joke, they let it go to pots.  I am just thankful that the kids didn't try to give each other home tonsillectomies again...I never could've driven anyone to the ER without passing out.

And on a side note, let me just say that I am hooked on watching 24 now. A black president? A rich political backer who is black? Criminals who are white? Talk about defying TV's racial stereotypes! Season 3 really impressed me in that way (even though it got in my head...okay in my nose...for a while.)

Here's to your health! Wishing you all a happy, healthy summer.